Date Ettiquette for clients
Do’s and Don’t for seeing an escort
Courtesy of Netflix
So, you’ve got over the first hurdle and sent a message. You’ve sent a deposit and booked a date. You’ve arranged a location, time frame, and prepared your cash donation. The only thing left to do is turn up and enjoy yourself! But this can be daunting, especially if it’s your first time, so I’ve been working on this guide for clients who want some guidance on how to behave on a date, whoever that’s with: a professional girlfriend, escort, sex worker, hooker, GFE provider, dominatrix, pro-domme, pro-sub, sugar baby, etc. Whether it’s a high end overnight girl friend experience, or a quick tryst in a dungeon, everyone deserves to feel safe and respected during the encounter. That’s why I’ve been working on this list of Do’s and Don’ts for your first interaction with a sex worker.
Of course, everyone’s different, and this is by no means a comprehensive guide, but after having many conversations with other sex workers, and trawling through a lot of Reddit threads, here is some of the best advice I can offer:
The most important thing to remember is that your provider is a human being. Apart from the money (which yes, you give them at the beginning of the encounter), this is just like hooking up with any other human being. Be polite, kind, and respectful, and expect the same from them.
DO arrive on time or communicate any unforeseen delays. We know things come up, especially when you work hard for a living, and you might be running late. It’s courteous to let us know in advance if you’re running late for our date.
Before:
DO arrive having recently showered (in the last 1-2hrs) This includes brushing your teeth/mouthwash. If this isn't possible for whatever reason, communicate it with the provider beforehand, most people would be more than happy to let you jump in the shower. Hell, we might even get in with you…
DO offer to provide UNOPENED drinks for longer appointments. This is thirsty work! Some people don’t drink alcohol when they’re working, and some do. It’s not necessary to provide refreshments, but it’s a classy touch and will definitely be appreciated. These are the kinds of things that make clients stand out to us, put us in a good mood, and feel enthusiastic about repeat bookings.
DO express an intent to extend the encounter if you think you would like to. If you think you’d like more time, give us a heads up in advance, that way we can rearrange transport, schedules, or whatever we need to do, so that we can relax and indulge in each others’ company.
During:
DO accept their offer to take a quick shower if the provider asks you to: Everyone has their own expectations around cleanliness. If you’ve already showered and you smell good, this probably won’t be necessary, and I certainly wouldn’t enforce it, but if it’s your providers policy, then this doesn't have to be full-blown, just hit the hotspots where you want their mouth to go…
DO lay the donation down in a clearly visible area upon arrival: (nightstand, TV Stand, Counter). If you’re meeting in public for your date, slip it into a card, envelope, or book and pass it to your provider subtly. Getting this out of the way as soon as possible dissipates any potential awkwardness around asking for it. We get a lot of questions about knowing what to do with the money. In the UK, our culture is super fucking weird about exchanging money and paying for services, so to keep things running as smoothly as possible, take care of this as quickly as you can. Make sure it’s the amount and method agreed in advance, pop it down on the side, and get on with the business of enjoying your time together.
DO discuss specific expectations/boundaries that weren't already addressed in the ad. This includes specific kinks you may wish to explore. Let us know in advance if you have specific roleplay, activities, or kinks you’d like to explore. This way your provider knows what you want ahead of time. They may wish to research some of your kinks if they’re niche, in order to give you a more thorough experience. Watching porn or reading can be an excellent way to prepare for requests from clients when they’re given in advance. You might even have some overlapping interests, which is always exciting, and makes for a really fun date. It also means you’ll have an idea of what your provider doesn’t do, which leads us nicely on to the next point:
DO respect any boundaries that they express. I don’t need to tell you that no means no. A sex worker’s boundaries are not up for debate. Money doesn’t equal consent, so if you want something specific, check before the date that your companion is up for doing it. There’s nothing worse than an awkward conversation when you’re half dressed!
DO relax and enjoy yourself. At the end of the day, the encounter is about you. Unless of course, you want it to be all about me… What you’ve paid for is the experience, whether that’s me worshipping your cock, tying and teasing you, taking you deep into my throat, stroking your hair and telling you you’re a good boy, locking your cock in a cage and making you watch while I touch myself, whispering flithy things into your ear while you fuck me… hold on, I’m getting distracted again…
After:
DO leave on time. I don’t think I need to explain this one…
DO leave discreetly. If your companion is offering incalls this is especially important. We want to maintain good relationships with the hotels and apartments we use for work, and especially with our neighbours.
DON’T ask for personal information about your provider, or try to find their personal social media accounts. Most of us have real lives, day jobs, etc. and some people aren’t out about their other line of work. Of course, everyone has their own boundaries around this, but please respect sew workers’ rights to privacy.
DON’T treat us like objects: This probably goes without saying for most people, but I’ve read some posts by guys who think once they’ve paid, they can do whatever they want to their provider’s body, regardless of their wishes.
So, there’s a non-comprehensive list, but hopefully it gives you somewhere to start. If it’s your first time. you’re probably feeling a bit nervous, but at the end of the day we’re humans too, and (most of us) are pretty normal girls with pretty normal lives. We care about our clients and we want you to have a good time with us! We don’t mind if you are feeling shy or make mistakes, if your heart’s in the right place, and if you’re reading this it likely means that you care about us too. So, to all the ‘good ones’, thanks!